Supporting your loved one through postpartum depression

An estimated 40% to 80% of new mothers experience the "baby blues" and 13% to 19% experience postpartum depression, which is more serious. Having a new baby in the house can be joyful and exciting, but it can also be stressful and overwhelming.

Many partners, friends, and family members want to support and help their loved one after the birth of a new baby. But it can be challenging to know how to best support a mother and her infant — even more so if the mom is experiencing postpartum depression.

Know the facts about postpartum depression

Knowing the facts about the baby blues and postpartum depression will help you better understand what your partner, friend, or family member is going through. Actively seeking out resources and support for yourself can help you become a better caregiver too. If you are the first person to notice the signs of postpartum depression, you'll be in a good position to help her get the treatment she needs.

Women naturally experience hormonal changes during pregnancy and after giving birth. These changes — paired with the stressors (both good and bad) of pregnancy and childbirth — may cause the baby blues, also called postpartum dysphoria in many women. The baby blues start right after giving birth and last for about a week. Mothers may have mood swings, intense feelings, crying spells, a loss of appetite, and trouble sleeping. But the symptoms are not severe and usually get better on their own.

Postpartum depression, which also happens after the birth of a baby, lasts longer, has more severe symptoms, and requires treatment from medical professionals. It can start right after or anytime within the first year of giving birth. Some women have also reported feeling symptoms of depression during the last few weeks of pregnancy.

Postpartum depression can cause different symptoms including:

• Aches and pains
• Feeling restless
• Feelings of sadness, anxiety, and being overwhelmed
• Crying spells
• Difficulty sleeping
• Headaches
• Little energy or motivation
• No interest in or not feeling connected to the baby
• Significant loss of appetite
• Severe mood swings
• Thoughts of self-harm
• Thoughts of hurting the baby
• Trouble concentrating, focusing, or remembering

Postpartum depression is caused by a combination of factors including hormonal changes, personal and family mental health history, life stressors, and brain chemistry and structure.

Some women are at a greater risk of developing postpartum depression, including women who:

• Are dealing with other stressful life events or situations
• Are struggling with alcohol or illicit substance misuse
• Are younger than 20 years old
• Did not plan to become pregnant
• Do not have good social support
• Had complications during an earlier pregnancy or birth
• Have a disability or a baby with a disability
• Have a history of being abused
• Have a personal or family history of depression or another mental illness
• Have severe premenstrual syndrome

It's crucial to seek support from a provider if your loved one experiences symptoms of postpartum depression for more than two weeks. Without help, her condition could get worse.

Postpartum depression may also get in the way of a mother bonding with her new baby, which can impact the baby's development in many areas including:

• Behavior
• Cognitive development (learning, thinking, and problem-solving)
• Language
• Social-emotional skills (forming relationships and recognizing, managing, and sharing emotions)

Always communicate

It's important to keep the lines of communication open. The mother may want to talk a lot or not at all. Either way, let her know you are there for her.

If you want to start a conversation, ask what's on her mind and listen without judgment. Tell her you care about her and want to know how she's doing.

She may not open up, but knowing you care matters a lot. This can be especially helpful when others talk only about the new baby.

Give support

Let her know she's not alone and you are there to help. You could offer to:

• Arrange childcare so you can spend time alone together
• Clean the house
• Do the laundry
• Drive her to appointments
• Prepare meals
• Shop for groceries
• Spend time with the baby while she visits friends or gets a manicure

Provide resources

Some women feel embarrassed or ashamed of their depression and may not want to seek professional help. Encourage her to talk with her provider or attend a support group with other moms.

You can also offer to collect some information about postpartum depression and read through it with her, and give her contact information for a postpartum depression support group.

Share the National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline number: 988 and encourage her to use it. Simply calling or texting 988 or using the chatting feature on their website, 988Lifeline.org, will connect you to 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention, and crisis resources for you or your loved ones.

Additional resources include:

· Maternal and Child Health MOMS Helpline: 844-624-6667 (Monday-Friday, 7:30 a.m.-5 p.m. EST). Access MOMS Helpline by text message at 844-MOMS-TXT (844-666-7898) for English and 844-SER-MAMA (844-737-6262) for Spanish.

· Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration's National Helpline: 800-662-4357 (24/7)

Take care of your own mental health

It can be difficult to support a loved one who is going through postpartum depression. Up to 25% of a new mother's partners also experience anxiety or depression during the baby's first year.

Reach out to your own medical provider or find a support group or counselor for yourself if you need support. It's important to not only give care but also receive it when necessary. You're also showing people you take your mental health seriously.

Reid Health OB/GYN is here for your family before, during, and after pregnancy. Call the location nearest you or request an appointment to talk about postpartum depression treatment.